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Lyrics for Welcome To The United States
By Frank Zappa

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[includes Narrhalla-Marsch (trad.) and a quote from Louie Louie (Richard Berry)]

Reiner Romer: Ladies and gentlemen, here he goes, Peter Rundel, he seems to be disgusted. Whatever. Ridero ridera! [...] Ha ha ha! LAUGH NOW! (HA HA HA HA HA!) Be quiet! Von seiner Werkbank zu uns heute Abend hergekommen ist unser Hermann Kretzschmar wolle merm reinlasse? Laugh now! (HA HA HA HA HA!)

Welcome to the United States

This form must be completed by every nonimmigrant visitor not in possession of a visitor's visa.

Type or print legibly in pen in ALL CAPITAL LETTERS. USE ENGLISH.

Item 7 - If you are entering the United States by land, enter LAND in this space. (LAND!) If you are entering the United States by ship, enter, unh-unh, SEA in this space.

Do any of the following apply to you? (Answer Yes or No)

(No! No! Yes! No! Yes! No!)

A. Do you have a communicable disease; (COUGH NOW! Coughs . . . ) physical or mental disorder; or are you a drug abuser or addict?

Tell me, Bill, Yes or No. (No) Louder. (No!)

B. Have you ever been arrested or convicted for an offense or crime involving moral turpitude or a violation related to a controlled substance; or ever been arrested or convicted for two or more offenses for which the aggregate sentence to confinement was five years or more?

Answer Yes or No. (Yes! Yes, sir! Yes! No! No! No!)

Or been a controlled substance trafficker; or are you seeking entry to engage in criminal or immoral activities?

Answer Yes or No. (Yes or No) Thank you!

C. Have you ever been or are you now involved in espionage or sabotage; or terrorist activities; or genocide; or between 1933 and 1945 were you involved, in any way, in persecutions associated with Nazi Germany or its allies?

Answer Yes or No. (Yes)

Thank you very much! And welcome to the United States!

Reiner Romer: Thank you very much! Here they go! Frank Zappa and Hermann Kretzschmar! Back on stage, Peter Rundel!